So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
