New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Randomize
