Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
Randomize