this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
