Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
Sex in the backyard? Check.
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
Randomize
