yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
Randomize
