all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
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