My friends, they love my intelligence
dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
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