I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
Randomize
