shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
Who died my cat blue again?
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
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