Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
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