I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Randomize
