there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
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