Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
Randomize