Tonight was fucked up. First my mom called me and told me I had to go to the bar to pick up my dad 'cause he was drunk. Then when I got there my dad was doing a body shot from this lady who happened to be my 1st grade teacher. By far the most awkward car ride home. Idk if I should tell my mom or not.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
Hello Officers/Paramedics, judging by last night, my friend is dead. The money in his pockets is mine, he owed me. Please send me directions to whichever morgue/strip club for pick up.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
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