do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
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