The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
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