he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
