You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
The dentist just called my mother to confirm the appointment that I made on his answering machine at 4:33 am this morning..
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Randomize
