i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
Randomize