What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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