I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Things I woke up with this morning: half a mcmuffin, orange hair, one shoe and a friendly german man. Tequila was a brilliant idea.
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
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