Sry I called you an 8
My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
Randomize