oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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