Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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