This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
My bed is full of blood and feathers
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
i need some magic done to my vagina
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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