Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Randomize
