Dual....:-)
remember when u banged some random dude twice in the back restaurant room of the bar i work at with customers still there? and woke up with an enormous highschool-sized hickey this morning? no big deal.
I slept walked to the toilet and woke up pooping. Easily one of the most disorienting events of my life.
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
Randomize
