There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
Randomize
