Taylor Swift is so right about you.
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
Randomize