That cute girl I hooked up with last night clawed my back to hell and gave me a hickey. I look like a white trash warewolf victim
Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
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