There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
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