just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
Randomize
