your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
I want to walk on stilts...naked
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
How do I know I'm high? Let me count the ways.
1. I put the milk in the cupboard, 2. Everything tastes fucking amazing, 3. My dog is really soft, 4. The lunesta butterfly flew out of my tv and touched me
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize
