i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
Just want the two of you to know, I went to a golf tournament today. Respectable, expensive… Flipped the golf cart. Seriously, I'm 40. What the fuck?
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Randomize
