your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
Randomize
