me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
