It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
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