I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
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