Nicole vs. Life
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Randomize
