You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
Randomize
