I am in a vortex of obligation.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
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