we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize
