so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize