Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
Randomize
