let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
Randomize