Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
You tipped the Uber driver extra for taking your phone away while you were drunk texting
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize
