just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
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