no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
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