Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
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