everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize
